Showing posts with label Michael Jackson. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Michael Jackson. Show all posts

Monday, June 10, 2013

Janet Jackson Cuts Brothers Off Financially



Janet Jackson recently entered the "billionaire club' after it was revealed that the singer has grossed a bil­lion dollars from concert tours, acting gigs, album sales and corporate spon­sorships. Since the announcement, the National Enquirer reported that Janet's brothers are lining up to ask for money, but Janet has reportedly cut them off...you know she's good for asking "what have you done for me lately?"

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Paris Jackson's Suicide Attempt



Paris Jackson, daughter of pop superstar Michael Jackson made headlines yesterday, after news broke that the 15-year-old tried to commit suicide by cutting herself with a meat cleaver, and overdosing on Motrin...wow, all of those good drugs her dad left behind and she picks period pills?!

Wednesday, January 16, 2013

Janet Jackson Could be $500 Million Richer in Five Years

Janet Jackson and Muslim Billionaire Wissam al-Mana are planning a lavish Muslim wedding in Qatar this spring. However, the billionaire's lawyers advised him to sign a pre-nup, but he deciding against it, and agreed to give Janet $500 million if they stay married at least five years...damn, did she offer to give up the secrets to the moonwalk?!

Thursday, November 8, 2012

Jermaine Jackson Files For Name Change

Jermaine Jackson has filed a request to legally change his last name from "Jackson" to "JackSUN". Jermaine says he wants to make the change for "artistic reasons"....I'm guessing JackOFF was taken!

Monday, October 8, 2012

Janet Jackson Converts to Islam to Marry Qatari Billionaire

Janet Jackson and her billionaire fiancé Wissam Al Mana are reportedly planning to get married in Doha, Qatar in 2013. Janet and Wissam will be wedded in a Muslim ceremony, as "Miss Jackson if you're nasty" has reportedly converted to Islam....good thing he's a billionaire, because she'll need a lot of that fabric when she gets to her heavy weight!

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Janet and Paris Jackson Go Toe to Toe

After a reported scuffle between Janet and Paris Jackson that ended with the two slapping each other, Paris Jackson has been advised to seek an order of protection against Janet Jackson....I'm not saying I know any Janet Jackson fans personally, but it's best that Paris obtain a restraining order against me...I mean them as well, because things could get Nasty and out of Control!

Thursday, June 7, 2012

Blanket Isn't Feeling Justin Beiber

Justin Bieber was excited to meet Michael Jackson's kids at a recent NBA game, but it looks like Blanket had other thoughts...Who the f*ck are you?...I thought I was the only boy who looks like a girl around here!

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Michael Jackson's Moonwalking In His Grave

Michael Jackson's daughter, Paris Jackson went from being covered up to the public, to posting bikini pictures to the public....I would tell her to grab a blanket, but that would be confusing for her little brother!

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Thriller Killer


Fans cheered loudly as a jury in Los Angeles found Dr Conrad Murray, guilty of killing Michael Jackson with a massive dose of hospital anaesthetic propofol..... One down, now who do we lock up for turning him into a white woman?!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Michael Jackson's Murder Trial Resumes Today


Testimony in the most boring murder trial had been cancelled earlier this week, so that the prosecution's final witness could deal with family affairs....if only Michael Jackson would have just held on a bit, he could've finally been able to fall asleep by watching his own trial!

Friday, September 30, 2011

Michael Jackson Murder Trial Compared to OJ Trial


After two days of testimony in the Michael Jackson murder trial, the media is now comparing it to the OJ Simpson murder trial....Ok, I can see at least one similarity....a black man on trial for murdering a white woman!

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Michael Jackson's Death Photo


The manslaughter trial of Michael Jackson's personal doctor, Conrad Murray, began Tuesday with a shocking photo of the singer's dead body...."He's dead, he's dead, we know it, we know!"

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Sly Stone is Lives in a Car


The New York Post broke the news that funk legend Sly Stone is broke and homeless. Sly has spent his professional career making bad financial choices, including selling his music-publishing rights to Michael Jackson for an under priced $1 million....Talk about bad choices...you have to get permission to borrow your music from someone named Blanket!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Nancy Grace Joining Dancing with the Stars


ABC has officially announced that Nancy Grace will be apart of the new cast of Dancing with the Stars....The Michael Jackson trial has been saved by the waltz!

Monday, August 29, 2011

Britney Saluted by Lady GaGa's Alter Ego


Lady Gaga presented Britney Spears with the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award....Clearly Gaga is also trying to present the idea of Karate Kid 3.....Ralph Macchio Gets Britney!

Monday, July 25, 2011

Mila's Friends With Benefits


Mila Kunis is starring in 'Friends With Benefits' with Justin Timberlake, the number 3 movie this week, but can you believe she dated Macaulay Culkin for 5 years?....Yes, right after he stopped dating Michael Jackson!

Friday, July 1, 2011

Aaron Carter: "Michael Jackson Gave Me Cocaine"


Aaron Carter has claimed that Michael Jackson once offered him alcohol and cocaine when he was 15. Carter also says, "I did things with him that nobody else did."....In other words, MJ did not molest him!

Monday, March 21, 2011

Justin Bieber Beats Michael Jackson


Justin Bieber's 'Never Say Never' has out grossed Michael Jackson's 'This Is It' film, becoming the most successful domestic concert film ever. Bieber's movie has taken in $72.2 Million....Something tells me MJ wouldn’t have a problem with this young boy "beating" him!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Blast From the Past


Remember the dark skinned black girl, Kim, from the 80's show A Different World. Yeah, that's her now.....Well, we know who got Michael Jackson's skin bleaching cream in his will!

Friday, June 25, 2010

The Anniversary: My Michael Jackson Tribute


June 25, 2009- The day my childhood laughed, cried, and died. Words can't express the sadness that I'm feeling, not because I knew Michael Jackson, but because I grew up with Michael Jackson's music and greatness. I could measure my childhood with a Michael Jackson music stick, and I feel privileged that I lived through a time to witness his creative gifts and talent. Yet, I feel awful for the generations to come, who will never bare witness to this virtuoso.
As I think back, Michael Jackson is responsible for many "1st" in my life......

"My 1st emergency room visit"- This particular day I was so determined to record the song Somebody's Watching Me from the radio. A song where MJ only performed the backup vocals. I sat waiting and waiting for it. Then, my younger brother asked "chalaire would you like to play monopoly." So, I was in the middle of an intense game of monopoly, probably stealing from the bank, as I often did when playing against my brother Dee. All of a sudden, I heard, "Somebody's Watching Me" coming from the radio. As I tried to leap over my brother's head, I tumbled down a flight of stairs, and was knocked unconscious. I wore glasses at the time, so there were broken pieces of glass stuck in my eyes. My mom ran into the emergency room with me tossed over her shoulders explaining, "She was trying to record a Michael Jackson song," while my younger brother cried "Oh no Michael Jackson killed my sister."

"My 1st Halloween beat down"- One particular Halloween I planned to dress as Michael Jackson. I had the socks, the glove, and a fake Thriller jacket, so it was a no-brainer. My mom felt there were going to be too many kids with the same idea idea, so at the last minute she said, "you're going as Tina Turner." I cried for 2 hours, refusing to get dressed. I then screamed at the top of my lungs that my mom was an abuser for not letting me dress as Michael Jackson....she quickly taught me the real definition of abuser!

"My 1st organized group"- I was such a class clown that i couldn't be bothered with the bad kids and after school gangs, so my friends Lonnie, Gina, and I started a group called The Jackson Crew, because we were huge Michael and Janet fans. Now, in order to be in The Jackson Crew, you had to be able to take turns hosting Michael & Janet Jackson viewing parties at your house. In addition, we had to celebrate every Jackson family member's birthday with a baked chocolate cake, and be able to duplicate every dance move at the drop of a dime. These parties became a big hit, as we held them once per week after school. My mom purchased chocolate cake mix like it was going out of style!

"My 1st charitable donation"- One day I decided to listen to We Are The World, about 50 times in a row before my mother said, "That's enough Chalaire." It inspired me to ask for an early allowance, in which, I mailed my cash allowance to the USA for Africa Foundation....I'm assuming they've never received it, but I thought I was helping Michael Jackson!

As I remember hanging around the TV to catch a brand new Michael Jackson video, arguing with classmates over who was better, Prince or Michael Jackson, receiving a phone call from my childhood friend Gina today, or cringing from reading tragic stories of his life, one thing is for sure, his music has touched everyone in some way, and because of his raw, genuine talent, his music will live on forever. A musical genius, a voice that will forever be ingrained in our hearts & minds. Never to be forgotten. MICHAEL JOSEPH JACKSON, THE TRUE KING OF MUSIC! R.I.P! "Do you remember the time...when we fell in love.....do you remember the time."

"If u enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with"-MJ 1958-2009

My favorite Michael Jackson video-Smooth Criminal